Stubborn.

I am stubborn and I hate giving up. It's a little running joke in our family that we are all stubborn, my three sisters, myself and our parents. I will fight for what I believe in, what I think is important, and I will fight even harder if I feel like it's being taken away from me. It churns in my stomach, weighs constantly on the back of my mind, pulling and tugging on my thoughts until I give it full attention.

When my twins were just 2 weeks old, I was - how can I say it - injured? I wanted so badly to tandem breast feed. It was very important to me that I get both boys on the exact same schedule. I didn't want to feed one and then the other, and then the other, and then, well you get it. For any of you who have nursed a baby before, you know the latch is the most important part when you are getting started and your skin is new and soft and non-calloused. I sacrificed that perfect latch to tandem feed. It was either feed them one at a time, with a good latch, or tandem feed with poor latches. I chose to tandem feed with poor latches and was therefor chewed on for two weeks straight, ignoring the searing pain.

There is a myth that many lactation consultants and websites feed new mothers - If it hurts, you are doing it wrong. This is just not true. The soft, new skin is not used to being treated the way a new baby, learning how to eat, treats it. It does hurt, but there is a certain level of pain that should not be tolerated. I ended up having to pump for weeks as it slowly healed. During that time I nursed each twin once per day. I still wanted to breast feed my babies.

E and J about 4 years ago

Many people questioned me during this time, wondered why I didn't give up, just give them formula when I was in so much pain. It was never an option for me. After all I'm stubborn and the benefits of breast feeding my babies, both emotional and physical,  came first for me.

I am so thankful I stuck with it. I never, ever regretted it and I can honestly say it made nursing my singleton so darn easy. I love helping new mamas with breast feeding struggles. Please email me or post a comment here with questions or concerns. Nursing your babes is such a gift for them and for you! I'm so blessed the Lord allowed me to continue through all the trials I went through.